Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
