do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize