You're completely useless in the revolution.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
