Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
