ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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