marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
