Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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