Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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