my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
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