apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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