don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
