I swear god or herbie drove my car home
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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