I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
We are two peas in an std pod
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize