Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
