thus making me awesome and them whores
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
