Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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