wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
