omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
