She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Randomize
