glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
thus making me awesome and them whores
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
