And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
