She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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