i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Randomize
