I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
