It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
