haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize