Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
