Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
