How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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