come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
