Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize