I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
