No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize