I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
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