I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
