we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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