Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
