Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Randomize
