I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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