one two three fourrrrnication!
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
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