If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
