Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
