I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Randomize
