Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
