I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
