What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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