So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Actions speak louder than pants.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
