bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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