Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
