so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
